In your favorite stories, you’re swept away into your imagination. The plot seems to unspool effortlessly, as if it is happening to you and not just the characters. In the pursuit of that sort of immediacy, some writers make the mistake of “filtering.”
Filtering is the tendency to distance the reader from the action by telling us the characters, experiences, rather than dramatizing the events. By doing so, the story leaves the realm of the heart and enters the realm of the mind, where things aren’t as visceral.
In this article, I’ll explore common ways that filtering sneaks onto the page, and then I’ll give you a Story Weapon to help you unlearn the habit.
Cutting down on filtering is a practice of disengaging passivity and prolix to make sentences more active. It is in the second nature of translating story into writing, which is why looking out for it as you revise is what will set your work apart. Experimenting at a scientific level with your work will allow it to get a cut above in your reader’s head and they’ll never want to put you down.
Example of filtering
Once you recognize filtering, you’ll develop an intuitive sense of how to eradicate it. I’ll bold and italicize the filter words below and show you how the writing changes without that distance between the reader and the action.
Guillermo felt the ground shake beneath his feet. He gulped as he watched the rocketship land. As smoke poured out of the exhaust, Guillermo chose to hold his breath and not choke on the rancid fumes. He winced as the sound of the engine pierced his ears. Guillermo thought that it must be an unholy coincidence. He remembered the first time he had seen this spaceship. It wasn’t a pleasant memory. Still, he knew this would be the last time.
Now let’s try this without the filtering and see the difference.
The ground shook beneath Guillermo’s feet. His throat went dry as the rocketship landed. Smoke poured from the exhaust and Guillermo held his breath. Better not to choke on the rancid fumes. The sound of the engine pierced his ears. This had to be an unholy coincidence. Guillermo knew this spaceship. The memory of the first encounter was an unpleasant one. This would be the last time.
In this second version, the action is delivered without everything being filtered through Guillermo’s perspective. It’s much easier for the reader to put themselves in that situation. The latter version is more immediate, more gripping.
Removing filter words also shortens your sentences and makes them punchier. As the events of the plot flood the reader’s senses, they’re drawn deeper into the world you’ve created.
“Let action unfold without a report. Let emotion be experienced, not noted.”
– Beth Hill, fiction editor
Knowing what to filter
One handy way to keep your drafts free of filters is to be conscious of filter words that (in most cases) are used to distance the reader from the action. These are words like: felt, saw, wondered, decided, chose, realized, remembered, noted, noticed, and thought. While these words have their place, they don’t need to be used all the time. They describe to us the reactions of the character, rather than what’s actually happening to them. We can assume that if something appeared before them, they saw it and apprehended it with their other senses.
If it can go, it should
You might be thinking, “Surely those words aren’t all bad?” You’re right! There are times when it’s crucial for us to know if a character saw something or had a thought. There are times when that’s more important than what they’re seeing or thinking. A good test to see if the word you’re considering is a filter word is to check if it’s load-bearing. Take it out. If the sentence crumbles and there’s no logical sense to it anymore, it might be necessary. If the sentence still stands, it had no place there anyway.
Don’t trust safe ground
Though we often turn to books for comfort or an escape, there’s a tendency amongst writers of a certain temperament to take the edge off what they put on the page. Maybe you’re cautious of the subject material being alarming or you’re too polite to put the reader in the tough situations you’ve created for the characters. Taking out filters is a great way to outgrow that habit.
We want the danger in a book to feel real and the stakes to be high. The best books don’t ask you to turn the next page, they demand it. By stepping out of the safety of the character’s heads, you can make the action more exciting and the emotions richer.
Your story weapon: Unlearning the habit
It might feel daunting to think there’s a habit you’ve picked up without realizing it, but as writers, we all have our language tics.
Firstly, do not concern yourself with filter words in your first draft. Your only job in the first draft is to let it rip, and to get the story down — filter words and all! But as you work your way through the rewrite and begin to shape your sentences, you will likely begin to find pleasure in allowing the filter words to fall away so that your prose flows more easily. Over time, removing filter words will become second nature.
Be patient with yourself. Sometimes, removing filters can feel like an assignment. It is! But when you notice that your work is springing to life, you’ll be thrilled that you did.
Filtering is a first instinct, cutting it out of your work elevates you to the next level. If you’re interested in where your instincts should take you next and how to guide them through deeper tools of craft, join one of my next workshops: The 90-Day Novel, The 90-Day Memoir, Story Day.
